I can't get all the old family stuff back in the drawer. But, at least I understand it better now.
I've always known I was raised by a pair of narcissists. I just never quite understood how dysfunctional my family really was/is. I suppose I can thank my brother and his treatment of me over the past 6 months for bringing it all up.
I thought it was normal for my brother to chase me with golf clubs trying to beat me up, for him to rip my clothes and jewelry and destroy my possessions...all because he was angry. And what did my parents do? Absolutely nothing. I'm 6 years older so somehow I was supposed to diffuse the problem and deal with it non-violently. No one ever protected me. No one ever corrected him. My mother told us, "little birds in their nest agree." In other words, don't bother me with YOUR problems (it doesn't matter that we were 2 to 8 years old at the time).
I thought that's how families were supposed to function. My therapist recently informed me that this is absolutely not how it should have been and I was surprised. I wish I could forget all about this. It's not like I can be mad at my 72+ year old parents. Somehow being mad at my brother for the old stuff seems unfair. But, he is responsible for his behavior as an adult and that is nearly as bad as when we were kids. It's been suggested that I have nothing further to do with my brother. Maybe that's the solution.
What now?
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